And life goes on

As if I don’t have enough stress, the phone rang this morning about 7:30 so Andy answered it. I could hear a close-to-hysterical female voice on the other end but then Andy is saying “are you in the hospital?”. My first thought is “Of course, Julie SHOULD be in the hospital – where else would she be!”  It turns out it was Marta, my sister-in-law – apparently Steve has had a stroke. They were out last night and on the way home, stopped at Denny’s for a bite to eat. As they were leaving, Marta realized that Steve wasn’t opening the car door so she asked what he was doing. He wasn’t able to speak properly and was slurring his words. She got him into the passenger’s seat and drove him to the hospital. She waited until it was a reasonable time before calling us. From what she has said, at least before talking to the neurologist, he doesn’t have any swelling on the brain and he can move his limbs – it seems to only be his speech that is impacted. Once again, she doesn’t want Lisa told because it might impact her studies. We did visit and he will be in hospital for a few days because they want to run some tests before releasing him. Even in the few hours we were there, we noticed a definite improvement in his speech so I think he will come out okay in the end.

So, back to Julie: She wants to come home and I don’t blame her.

Among her “adventures” this week – she didn’t get to come home, her bedpan was improperly placed, and she has had tubes replaced and so on.

Earlier in the week she was told that she would be discharged on Thursday. Ryan had booked his flight for Wednesday and it was going to cost several thousand dollars to change it, so he figured he would leave because she would be heading home about 24 hours later and that made sense. He was in the Heathrow Airport when Julie found out she wouldn’t be leaving after all. It turned out that the insurance company had been dealing with someone, who I have decided to call Iqbal, at an intermediary medical company. Iqbal was supposedly dealing with Julie’s doctor, Dr. Roy and communicating between Dr. Roy and World Nomads. World Nomads were having trouble getting in touch with Iqbal so finally in desperation they contacted Dr. Roy directly and found out she was not ready to come home. Julie phoned Ryan but they realized that he was not able to return because you need a Visa to enter India and he had already left the country so likely wouldn’t be allowed back in.

Then, it turns out that when the respiratory doctor saw Julie, he said she could not travel with a bubble (neumothorax?) she still had in her lungs. Dr. Roy had thought it would be absorbed but the respiratory doctor said no. By this time, she had had one tube removed but the other tube was still in. This new bubble required another tube so on Thursday, they inserted another tube. Unfortunately, in order to put in the new tube, they had to insert it in between her fractured ribs and they moved her ribs a bit while she was under anesthetic. When she woke up, they didn’t tell her until she complained how much she hurt. She said that her nerve endings are also acting up so every time she turns, her skin hurts like very bad sunburn.

So, after she had tube 3 inserted, she needed to go the bathroom. A staff member brought her a bedpan but put her it under backwards. This meant that it was worthless and the bed and her clothes all got wet. She has been using the call button by her bed but they keep resetting it at the nursing station instead of answering it so she ended up sitting there wet for about 1½ hours before it was taken care of. The nursing assistant yelled at Julie for wetting the bed then the nurse yelled at the orderly (or whoever) who had put it in wrong then it sounds like everyone was yelling at everyone before Julie was finally cleaned up.  She has only had her hair washed twice and it was a matter of leaning her head over the edge of the bed to do it. She has a sponge bath each day but no matter how good those are, you just never really feel clean if  you are accustomed to having a proper shower or bath, North American style.

Julie says that Renu came by in the last day or two and when she found out about the bedpan episode she demanded to talk to the Head Sister then yelled at her. Julie didn’t understand a work as they yelled at each other in Hindi but the tone was quite apparent. Julie was talking to Arjun, the Indian coordinator for IVHQ, and he was saying that the dialect of Hindi that is spoken in Faradibad is a harsh somewhat guttural sounding language which doesn’t help either.

Apparently while Ryan was staying with Julie, he got invited to Renu’s (the housemother) house one evening for supper. Julie said that Renu had (and had is the important word!) a box of Ferrero Rocher chocolates. Someone offered one to Ryan then left the box out. A short while later, Ryan looked like a hamster with his cheeks full of Ferrero Rocher chocolates and there were NONE left. He did tell Renu they were very good!

Several of the other girls on the homestay came by on Saturday to visit so that was good. She has arranged to purchase some handicrafts to bring home so she is anxiously awaiting their return with her choices.

Apparently there is only 1 English language TV station Julie can watch. She says that she has seen every movie they show at least 4 or 5 times each.  Sounds like variety is not their strongpoint. There are 2 English channels but only is one is working in her part of the hospital. Yesterday the aide put on a Hindi Christian channel that involved lots of singing and praying.

Because she can’t get around independently she is rather room-bound. She sometimes has the use of a walker but she said there only seems to be one on her unit so they keep taking it and leaving her stranded.

If I remember correctly, tube 2 is now out so she only the third one in place. She was telling me that they have clamped off tube 3 now but what they did was to cut it and leave the scissors sealing it, fold it in half and stick the folded end into an empty syringe. It doesn’t sound too professional to me but what do I know! They are leaving this tube in place until she gets home, the theory being that if it is needed on the flight home, it will be there and can be used if necessary. I hope that the airport security don’t insist the scissors be removed for her to travel!

She still believes she will have to be in quarantine once she gets home because of being in a hospital, having blood transfusions and being a medical transport case – I guess we will have to wait and see.

Now, she has to wait until Monday before she hears when she will be allowed to leave. The insurance company will arrange for a medical person to travel with her – they will probably arrange for someone from Europe rather than North America because their travel and recovery time will be so much less. I told Julie to make sure they bring a wheelchair with them because the hospital is not going to allow one of their wheelchairs to leave the hospital.

I hope this coming week brings better news all round.

Beware of Crash Ahead

I am so tired – I think I am ready to crash.

It has been a long almost 2 weeks – between 12 medical appointments (only 2 were mine) and the worry about Julie – I am bushed.

I know that I need to speak what I want rather than what I have but right now I lack the energy to think of what I want.

Andy and I both went to Costco yesterday for their free hearing tests (that counts as 2 medical appointments). My hearing is pretty much fine – a bit of age related loss in the very high ranges but Andy has some moderate losses in his left ear. They suggested he think about a hearing aid so now his whole focus is on hearing aids. He wants to make an appointment to go somewhere to look as some others and suggested tomorrow - I said flat out NO. He was interested in the Lyric aid until I was not too enthusiastic about its $1,200/year/ear subscription cost. He doesn’t want anything that might show or interfere when he takes off his glasses a few hundred times a day.

Our chiropractor suggested that QiDong would be able to “cure” Andy’s various diseases including his hearing loss, diabetes and heart issues. He has suggested we go to the home of Spring Forest QiDong in Eden Prairie, Minnesota. Apparently they offer 3, 4 and 5 day retreats to learn the proper techniques. The five day retreat is $1,300 for about 11 hours of actual training and healing over the period. I had a look at Google Maps to see just how far it is from home and it is an 18+ hour drive but I would get to go through Minot, North Dakota, where my friend and I drove through a few years ago when we took my mother’s car (because she lost her license) and drove it to Calgary for Julie. There is NO WAY I would consider doing this at this time of year – weather is just too unpredictable. We might talk about it in the summer.

For now, Ellie and I are discussing where we should go for a short vacation – New York is looking good at this time but first I need Julie home before I can relax.

Just writing this all down, I feel better. Maybe I should blog more often!

Steve

A friend was asking how Steve is. My normal answer is “alive”.

Back in April, when he ended up in hospital, they decided after his angiogram and umpteen other tests, that he had had 11 heart attacks. His diabetes was out of control and there really wasn’t much good news except that he was treatable.

Except for the night where we had a false alarm and he apparently had chest wall pain, his heart has not been causing any problems that he has told me about.

Months ago, I told him I was worried because his breathing while he is sleeping was not regular. He ended up wearing a monitor for a night. He finally got to see the sleep specialist last week. That doctor said that while Steve is not suffering from typical sleep apnea, his sleep patterns are not normal so they will be booking him into the hospital for a one night stay to do further research. The doctor is hoping he will get in sometime this month or at least by early October. He may end up needing oxygen at night or to wear a continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) machine at night. His lack of quality sleep is impacting his getting better. He is tired most of the day so he has catnaps then he is not really tired at night so he has very restless sleep so he is tired most of the day and so on and so on.

Since he has been on insulin for his diabetes, our doctor is pleased with his blood sugar levels. He is still not testing as often as suggested but the testing that is done every few months and that shows the average sugar levels over the previous three months has been good.

He is still doing his art work. This is one of his acrylic sculptures that is currently in our living room. It stands about 2 ½ feet high and about 18 inches across the bottom.


He was talking to owner of the foundry that is producing the next piece and apparently they are quite excited about the new piece. I know he is rather anxious to see the finished piece too.

When does it get better?

A friend gave me a book a few years ago called “Managing to be Free”. It was about getting organized and setting priorities as a Christian woman. I think the time has come to read it again!

One of the concepts that really stood out in my mind was the question of whether I am a thermostat or a thermometer – Do I set the atmosphere in my home or do I simply react? These days I am really a thermometer - and I really need to work on that.

Steve is still not feeling well – the doctor has given him something for the tingling sensations but it isn’t as effective as he wants. He is not sleeping well so he was also given a prescription for amitriptyline – which used to be called Elavil. It is actually an anti-depressant but can be used as a sleeping aid. He is supposed to start by taking one pill a night and he can keep adding pills – as soon as it helps, he is supposed to stop at that dosage, until he reaches a max of 15 a night. After about 4 nights he decided it wasn’t working! What this means is that he doesn’t sleep at night so he is napping on and off all day.

On Sunday, I decided my goal was to keep him up all day – I think he has got his days and nights mixed up – like the kids did as babies! I did succeed by going to the Farmer’s Market then Ikea. We had a good day, all in all.

I am really frustrated with him and while I realize some of what is going on is not under his control, that doesn’t stop me from getting short-tempered. He decided far too soon, at least in my opinion, to stop taking the pills so I guess I am blaming him for not sleeping.

I think he may be suffering from depression so I talked to him about it. Since then, things almost seem to be getting a bit better – maybe just realizing what is happening to him has helped.

He attended the Cardiac Centre’s exercise program’s information session today. He says he didn’t learn anything new but at least he went. Now he has to call them tomorrow to set up a time that will work for him to actually attend the classes.

Mel arranged for flowers to my Mom today for her birthday tomorrow. Mom called me tonight to tell me they had arrived and they are lovely. BUT, then she told me that she called Motor Vehicles and they have no record of her license being cancelled so she is planning to drive to the drug store and the grocery store tomorrow because she was really missing not having a car. I have called the hospital to ask them to look into this but now that she isn’t a patient, they may not be able to do anything. I told the nurse I talked to that there is nothing I can do from a distance and if she has an accident, they will have to deal with the fallout, not me.

My visit in 10 days time should be interesting! Wish me luck.